Post by anonymouswife on May 31, 2018 19:35:01 GMT
Sir Guy stressed the importance of staying the woman a man married- physically and also with the same cheery and encouraging disposition.
I wanted to discuss the idea of staying physically the same in marriage (other than aging). Mainly Sir Guy meant weight and keeping your appearance together. This reflects well on your husband etc.
Personally, I do strive to keep myself the same as when I was married. I exercise, eat healthy, take care of my skin, hair etc and love dressing up and doing makeup...
I do think there are some major challenges in this area and I wanted to bring it up for discussion.
Firstly- I think it is harder to keep one's weight down after marriage for 2 reasons
1) More stimuli - Maybe this is just me...I don't know if other's face this, but before I was married I was not around food that much. Staying slim was easy because I didn't cook a lot, I didn't prepare food for others etc. I didn't keep things I didn't want to eat in the house etc. Now with kids and my husband, I am a constant food-making machine. I am around food all the time and it makes it more difficult to only eat what I need. I need to exercise daily and carefully watch calories in order to maintain my weight and I do find this difficult.
2) Less motivation when more is needed (because of more stimuli)
I think many women become less motivated to keep their former selves because there is less reason to. Before marriage, being attractive had a lot of benefits! It meant more compliments, more men asking you out, more positive attention, the potential for Mr. Right to show up. Also, you want to look better than other women who are competing for the same men.
After marriage, there are less direct rewards. Your husband gets used to how you look and probably compliments you less than before. Other men in your life (who know you are married) feel it is disrespectful to compliment you and you no longer get asked out on dates, since you are married. There are less "rewards" for being attractive and therefore less motivation. Other women aren't necessarily competition because either they are also married or they are not that attractive anymore either. Regarding cheating, it seems men cheat on attractive spouses just as much as unattractive ones, so I don't think women are too concerned that their lack of attractiveness will lead to their husband leaving.
(Arnold Shwartzenager cheated on his gorgeous wife with his ugly maid, JZ cheated on the beautiful Beyonce...) It could be one of the factors leading a man to cheat but not necessarily.
Anyways was curious what others think about this topic.
I wanted to discuss the idea of staying physically the same in marriage (other than aging). Mainly Sir Guy meant weight and keeping your appearance together. This reflects well on your husband etc.
Personally, I do strive to keep myself the same as when I was married. I exercise, eat healthy, take care of my skin, hair etc and love dressing up and doing makeup...
I do think there are some major challenges in this area and I wanted to bring it up for discussion.
Firstly- I think it is harder to keep one's weight down after marriage for 2 reasons
1) More stimuli - Maybe this is just me...I don't know if other's face this, but before I was married I was not around food that much. Staying slim was easy because I didn't cook a lot, I didn't prepare food for others etc. I didn't keep things I didn't want to eat in the house etc. Now with kids and my husband, I am a constant food-making machine. I am around food all the time and it makes it more difficult to only eat what I need. I need to exercise daily and carefully watch calories in order to maintain my weight and I do find this difficult.
2) Less motivation when more is needed (because of more stimuli)
I think many women become less motivated to keep their former selves because there is less reason to. Before marriage, being attractive had a lot of benefits! It meant more compliments, more men asking you out, more positive attention, the potential for Mr. Right to show up. Also, you want to look better than other women who are competing for the same men.
After marriage, there are less direct rewards. Your husband gets used to how you look and probably compliments you less than before. Other men in your life (who know you are married) feel it is disrespectful to compliment you and you no longer get asked out on dates, since you are married. There are less "rewards" for being attractive and therefore less motivation. Other women aren't necessarily competition because either they are also married or they are not that attractive anymore either. Regarding cheating, it seems men cheat on attractive spouses just as much as unattractive ones, so I don't think women are too concerned that their lack of attractiveness will lead to their husband leaving.
(Arnold Shwartzenager cheated on his gorgeous wife with his ugly maid, JZ cheated on the beautiful Beyonce...) It could be one of the factors leading a man to cheat but not necessarily.
Anyways was curious what others think about this topic.
